


Oh, the Tricks Your Mind Can Play

by TonySawicki



Category: Dir en grey
Genre: Anal Sex, Awkwardness, Blow Jobs, Dirty Talk, Dream Sex, Face-Fucking, Finger Sucking, Fluff, Frustration, Hair Kink, Love Confessions, M/M, Mentioned Past Kaoru/Kyo, Nonsense, Praise Kink, Shameless Smut, Some Humor, Voice Kink, Wet Dream, mild exhibitionism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-24
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-10-23 13:28:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10720248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TonySawicki/pseuds/TonySawicki
Summary: “I perform better with at least a little preparation,” Die said, arching an eyebrow.Kyo took another step towards him and reached out to run a lock of Die’s hair between his fingers. “I think you can handle it,” he said, his voice low in a way that had Die almost shivering. “I’ve long suspected that your talents extend further than you give yourself credit for.”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> We now interrupt your regular update schedule with something, well, considerably kinkier. It's been a while since I posted some good, old-fashioned smut, hasn't it!  
> I guess I just got excited and wanted to post something before I might not have a chance for the next few days (I've got one more Dir en grey live to go to aahh!!), and this is just a little somethin'-somethin' but here it is! It's kind of more outright porn than usual but there's a fluffy kinda plot somewhere in there too. I hope you all enjoy!!

Die dropped down onto the couch against the wall of the dressing room, leaning his head back and stretching out his legs. Everything felt eerily quiet considering how recently they’d finished their live; no one else had made it to the dressing room yet, or else they’d all come and gone already.

He’d only rested a few minutes when the door opened and Kyo poked his head in beforesmirking and swaggering towards the couch where Die sat. “There you are,” he said. “Everyone was looking for you. We have to go back out there you know.”

Die nodded unhappily. “I haven’t learned any of the songs for that set,” he complained.

“You’ll be fine,” Kyo said. “Aren’t you kind of a natural at that? Being put on the spot and asked to perform?” His eyes seemed so _dark_ —when had he taken out his white contact lenses?

“I perform better with at least a little preparation,” Die said, arching an eyebrow. He could play Kyo’s games if that was what Kyo wanted, but it never got him anywhere.

Kyo took another step towards him and reached out to run a lock of Die’s hair between his fingers. “I think you can handle it,” he said, his voice low in a way that had Die almost shivering. “I’ve long suspected that your talents extend further than you give yourself credit for.”

Die couldn’t deny that having Kyo tugging ever so slightly at his hair was getting him more hot and bothered than it probably should have. He closed his eyes as Kyo’s fingers traced along his cheek, then paused at his lips. “And to just which talents are you referring?” he breathed, opening his eyes to meet Kyo’s again.

Kyo’s expression was something close to a sneer when he pushed two fingers between Die’s lips and watched Die accept them, sucking eagerly. “Get on your knees for me, Daisuke,” he said smugly. When Die complied without hesitation, Kyo removed his fingers from Die’s mouth, reaching to pet his hair almost affectionately for a moment before grabbing a fistful of it and pulling Die forward, whispering, “Now suck me off like a good boy.”

There was nothing Die wanted more in that moment than to be good for Kyo, and he worked Kyo’s pants open quickly, inhaling sharply at the sting of the hand still tight in his hair. 

He let out the tiniest of moans as he realized Kyo had nothing on under his jeans, and took out his cock, easily stroking him to full hardness. He leaned in to drag his tongue slowly up the length of it and felt Kyo’s grip tighten and release in his hair. He didn’t waste any time, soon taking more than half of Kyo into his mouth, swallowing around him.

“God, yeah, just like that,” Kyo said, his head falling back. His hand never left Die’s hair and Die loved it. Kyo rocked his hips, gently at first, but only increasing in pace and enthusiasm, and Die was surprised by how easily his throat opened up to him, not choking at all. He pushed his tongue against the underside of Kyo’s dick, enjoyed the weight and the heat of it there.

Soon Kyo was outright fucking Die’s mouth, and Die was sure he’d never been so aroused in his life, his own cock throbbing, still trapped in his leather pants. Kyo’s other hand came down to tangle in Die’s hair as well, so he could just hold Die’s head still while he thrust over his tongue, completely using him for his pleasure. The very thought of it had Die’s cock leaking pre-cum.

Kyo lifted his head to look down at Die’s face, and Die nearly gasped, stunned by the overpowering lust in his dark, dark eyes, pupils blown as Kyo stared down at him. “You want me to cum right down your throat, don’t you?”

Die didn’t dare pull back to answer him, so he just let out another moan as he thought _please!_ as loudly as he could, his eyes still locked on Kyo’s, hands gripping Kyo’s thighs.

“Die!” Kyo groaned as he started to shake. “Ohh, _Die_!”

And Die was shaking too, feeling the tightness low in his belly, and how could he be so close when he hadn’t even touched himself?

“ _Die_!!”

Die’s eyes snapped open to find Kyo staring down at him, looking almost concerned. But this was no post-live, sex-driven Kyo; it was tour bus Kyo, in a hoodie, sunglasses low on his nose, sleep-rumpled and endearing, holding Die’s shoulders instead of his hair, and oh, that’s where the shaking was coming from. Die looked down at Kyo’s hands on his shoulders, and they were quickly removed.

“Sorry,” Kyo said, pulling back from where he’d been leaning into Die’s space. “And sorry to wake you when you were… probably having a pretty good dream.” He raised his eyebrows at Die, glancing down briefly.

Die cringed a little, knowing there wasn’t anything he could really do to hide just how hard he was at that moment. He supposed that was what he got for falling asleep on the couch on the bus.

“Just, we’ve stopped to get food, and I didn’t want you to go without, but well,” Kyo pulled his lower lip between his teeth. “I’ll just bring you back something? Maybe you… have something you wanna take care of before you get off the bus.” He gave Die a half-smile as he started to back away, finally turning and heading the rest of the way down the aisle to exit the bus and head into the restaurant.

Die stayed where he was for a while, minute ripples of pleasure from his dream still dancing through him. He was unsure what to do about it. A dream like that shouldn’t have gotten him so hot but wow, it definitely had, and he _shouldn’t_ have been thinking about his bandmate in that way, but wow, now he definitely was. Obviously Kyo was objectively sexy, and he’d known that already, but he hadn’t ever had him show up in his subconscious like that before, and all he could do was pray that it wasn’t going to have any impact on his real life interactions with him.

He didn’t really feel comfortable finishing himself off knowing he wouldn’t be able to keep Kyo out of his head while he did it, so he splashed some cold water on his face, went back to his bunk, and pulled up something dry to read on his tablet to distract him. It wasn’t too much later that his body had calmed down and he heard this bandmates returning to the bus. 

A quiet knock sounded on the wall outside his bunk, followed by Toshiya’s voice. “Die? You in there?”

Die hesitated before reaching for the curtain, dreading however Toshiya was probably going to mock him, having presumably heard from Kyo about his little predicament. Oh well, as long as they didn’t know exactly what had caused it. He pulled the curtain back with a sigh.

“Hey,” Toshiya said. He held out a bag with the restaurant’s logo on it. “Kyo said you weren’t feeling great, but we brought you back something. You want it now or I could put it in the fridge…?”

Die blinked a few times at the bag being held out to him and then took it from Toshiya. “Um, I’ll have it now. Thanks.”

Toshiya shrugged. “Thank Kyo. I’m afraid I didn’t even think to ask if you wanted anything, so sorry about that. Hope you feel better though.” He walked back up towards the front of the bus without another word, leaving Die completely puzzled.

He greatly appreciated Kyo’s not having apparently said anything to the rest of the group, even though it would have been easy to embarrass Die with it, and not really below the kind of teasing Die tended to pull himself. And it was nice of him to actually bring him back food too. Was Kyo always so considerate and Die just didn’t pay enough attention to notice usually? He frowned as he realized that was probably the case, and he could think of plenty of other times Kyo had casually done something to help Die out, but Die had never thought anything of it. He felt gross knowing the only reason he was even noticing now was because he was still thinking about the dream he’d had. About Kyo’s seriously impressive cock in his mouth. Which he really _shouldn’t_ be thinking about. He shook his head to clear the residual images and started to open the bag of food, taking out the sandwich inside and unwrapping it.

He suddenly wondered if he should be concerned that Kyo hadn’t come by to bring the food himself and had sent Toshiya instead. Was he uncomfortable coming and talking to him? Surely it wasn’t a big deal. It wasn’t the first time something like this had happened within the band; such things were inevitable when a group of guys spent so much time in close quarters. Although this was definitely the first time Die had had one of his bandmates feature in his dreams in such a capacity. But Kyo couldn’t _know_ that’s what Die had been dreaming about, right? No, Die was just overthinking it. Kyo had probably sent Toshiya with the food because he was too lazy to walk back to the bunks. 

Die tried to push the whole issue from his mind and focus on eating instead. It was in the past and it wouldn’t come up again, but if nothing else, it had reminded him to be a little more appreciative of Kyo’s small kindnesses.

 

Only he didn’t really manage to push it from his mind. Every time Die looked at Kyo, he was reminded again of how vividly he’d felt Kyo’s thighs under his hands, of how his eyes had seemed to bore into him all filled with need and want. The next day as they prepared for the night’s live, he managed to mostly avoid him, but there was no escape once they were onstage and he found this was the worst possible place to look at Kyo.

That should have been obvious of course. How long had Die been doing concerts with Kyo and he was going to act like he didn’t know what kind of sexual being Kyo was in front of an audience? Still, he wasn’t prepared for it or for how it would affect him. Sure, it was bad when Kyo was over there drooling on himself and gyrating madly to the very notes that Die was playing, but even moments when Kyo was just standing still, he radiated this unbearable sexual energy, his stance wide, hips shifted forward, something burning in his eyes.

Die did his best not to look at Kyo at all, but that wasn’t always possible, and once he glanced over to see Kyo looking back at him, his head tilted almost curiously. Die tried to focus his suppressed feelings into getting the crowd even more riled up. He succeeded in that the response from the audience was incredible and the whole vibe of the show was heightened, but he did not succeed in keeping himself from stealing looks at Kyo, his eyes wandering over his ridiculous abs and down to his hip bones. And just why was it necessary for Kyo to wear his pants so _low_? Die would catch himself staring, licking his lips as he imagined pulling those pants down just a few more inches, revealing everything. He watched Kyo’s hands, so graceful and strong, his fingers tangled around the cord of his microphone, and barely kept back the sigh that wanted out as he thought how it would feel to have those hands tangled in his hair instead.

He was relieved when the live came to an end and once he’d tossed out his towel and picks he almost ran off the stage, hoping a cold shower might do him some good, although he didn’t know how he would be able to clear his _head_ of all this. Now that he was aware of it, he was sure Kyo had _always_ been this attractive, and wasn’t likely to stop any time soon, so he’d better figure out just how he was going to deal with it. It was really a wonder that he hadn’t had this crisis sooner.

To Die’s dismay, Kyo caught his arm just as he was heading from his dressing room to the showers. “Hey.”

Die forced himself to meet Kyo’s eyes. “Otsukaresama,” he said.

“Otsukare,” Kyo said, inclining his head slightly and dropping his hand from Die’s arm. He looked thoughtfully at him. “Everything all right?”

Die just managed to keep his eyes from following a solitary bead of sweat as it dripped from Kyo’s collarbone down between his pecs, dragging his gaze instead back to Kyo’s face. “Yeah, fine. Why do you ask?”

“It just seemed like—during the live…” Kyo shook his head. “I don’t know. Forget it, it’s probably just me.”

“Yeah? Okay,” Die said. He hoped he didn’t look too relieved. “I’m gonna hit the showers.”

Kyo nodded and turned back to his own dressing room, frowning a little.

In the shower, Die let the tepid stream fall over him and willed his body to relax. They had more shows coming up, and he couldn’t let himself react this way every time Kyo was hot onstage or he’d never get anything done. Still he kept accidentally getting the mental image of Kyo with his own saliva dripping down his chest, how some had dribbled right on his nipple, how in the light it had looked less like saliva and more like—

Die let out a little frustrated noise as he looked down and saw that his train of thought was doing nothing to quiet his erection. He was still determined to not jerk off to the thought of his bandmate, since that would be crossing some kind of line he couldn’t come back from. He turned the water a bit colder and thought about the depressing political climate overseas and in time managed to calm himself down. 

He got dressed and thought this would be just another thing he could manage. It was just that it was still so fresh in his mind it was distracting. Over time it would fade, and he’d look at Kyo in the same way he always had: with respect and a certain amount of friendly affection. Maybe a pinch of exasperation. He had to admit though, he was impatient for it to get back to that point.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I'm a mess and this is not what should get posting priority right now, but here's some more nonsense to distract y'all from how I'm not updating the fic I should be.

Die relaxed against the pillows of the hotel bed with an unrestrained sigh. It felt good to be in a bed for once and not crammed onto the bus. He could hear Kyo, his roommate for the night, singing something vaguely in the shower, and he smiled a little. He wouldn’t ever say so in front of him, but Die could spend hours upon hours just listening to Kyo’s voice, even just like this; not full performance-mode, just the lilt and flow of it so calming and sweet. He was distracted enough by this that he wasn’t even thinking about Kyo naked in the shower, or the possible issue with them sharing a hotel room. He was just listening to Kyo as he watched some news program on the TV with the sound turned down.

All too soon he heard the shower shutting off and was quick to raise the volume a bit on the television to make it less obvious he’d been listening in. Kyo came striding out of the bathroom a minute later, his towel tied around his hips, heading for his duffel bag to pull out something to sleep in. Die didn’t try to stop himself from looking up and over as Kyo crossed the room and smirked when he saw Kyo’s towel was tented out some in the front.

Unable to resist the opportunity to embarrass Kyo, Die said, “Wow, did you really get that turned on by the sound of your own voice?”

Kyo turned to look at him in surprise, but was then smirking himself. “Did _you_?”

Die’s eyes widened as he looked down at his own lap. He honestly hadn’t even _noticed_ his erection but now that he knew it was there, it suddenly seemed totally overwhelming. How could he have failed to notice as this was happening? “I don’t… I didn’t know—” Die stammered, his face flushing as he tried to pull the comforter over himself.

Something glinted in Kyo’s eyes and then he was making his way over towards Die’s bed, his fingers playing temptingly at the top edge of the towel he was still wearing. “No? It wasn’t my voice that got you so worked up? What was it then, Die? Were you out here watching porn with the volume turned down or what?”

Die shook his head defensively. “I wasn’t! I don’t know what brought this on, I swear.” Although the way Kyo was looking at him now certainly wasn’t making it let up any.

And Kyo definitely seemed to be aware of that—and was _he_ harder too, or was it Die’s imagination? “Gotta say, that looks pretty uncomfortable,” Kyo said lowly, and god, his voice really did do things. “Maybe you want some help taking care of it.”

Die’s body wasn’t about to let his brain control his mouth long enough to argue, and instead he was pushing the covers off his legs, his eyes glued on Kyo as he finally let the towel fall to the floor at the foot of the bed. Die gave a choked sort of moan as Kyo showed himself off; his cock was basically perfect, and even more impressive than Die had dreamt it. Kyo crawled towards him on the bed and Die spread his legs instinctively, which had Kyo grinning.

“Tell me, how could I make you more comfortable?” Kyo murmured, stroking his hands up both Die’s thighs and hooking his fingers in the waistband of his pajama pants. He flicked his eyes up to Die’s face, giving him the chance to object before he was yanking everything down and off and tossing it to the floor. 

“Oh,” Die said. Somehow he couldn’t begin to form the words for everything he wanted Kyo to do to him. The proximity of Kyo’s perfect, hard dick caused his brain to vacate the premises. He closed his eyes as Kyo threaded his fingers through Die’s hair, pushing it back from his face.

Die’s eyes popped back open at the feeling of Kyo’s other hand moving over his cock, and he let out something like a whine as he looked down to see Kyo’s tattooed fingers curled around his length. It was such a perfect sight, it felt like something out of an art film, or maybe it was just out of the fantasies he’d been telling himself he wasn’t allowed to have ever since he’d woken up from that dream about Kyo, and god, wasn’t _that_ what he wanted? Kyo keeping his hand tight in his hair while he fucked his mouth?

Kyo apparently had other ideas, because the hand on Die’s cock was moving lower, moving _back_ , and Die reached out to grab Kyo’s shoulders as he felt his fingers teasing around his hole.

“Oh!” Die said again, uselessly. He tried to make something else come out of his mouth and rather abruptly said, “I—Kyo, _fuck me_.” He gasped, shocked by his own request, but Kyo didn’t seem disturbed by it at all. He was actually grinning again and then pulling his hand back to open the drawer of the nightstand.

He came back with lube and Die thought it was awfully considerate for the hotel to provide such things, though he wouldn’t have known to look for it. Was this something Kyo did often? Had Kyo had his way with all the rest of the band like this? It wasn’t a displeasing mental image. Die spread his legs wider, offering himself easily for Kyo to do as he liked.

Kyo leaned in to kiss him then, his tongue moving along Die’s lips, and did he _know_ just how desperate he was making him with every touch? His hand was in Die’s hair again and then his other hand was back prodding at Die’s asshole, his fingers wet with lube. Die let out another gasp against Kyo’s mouth as he felt the first finger slip into him. He immediately wanted more, squeezing Kyo’s shoulders again as he tried to ride Kyo’s hand, only to feel the grip on his hair tighten almost painfully.

“I need you to relax and hold still,” Kyo whispered, his lips still touching Die’s. 

Die nodded, his eyes squeezed shut, trying not to whimper.

Kyo kissed him again, wet and coaxing, as his finger moved gently in and out of Die’s body. He kissed the corner of Die’s mouth, across his cheek, and then caught Die’s earlobe between his teeth, tugging lightly. He added a second finger and Die’s mouth fell open, but the stretch felt _good_ , and then Kyo was breathing against his ear, “Good boy… Let me open you up.”

This time, Die didn’t manage to suppress the whimper that wanted out, having Kyo call him a “good boy” only calling up more images of the dream he’d had about him, and then Kyo’s fingers hit something inside of him that had him moaning loudly. “ _Kyo_ , your cock,” he managed, trembling as Kyo licked up the length of his neck. “Give it to me.”

Kyo gave a low moan of his own at that, and pulled his fingers free, leaving Die feeling strangely empty as Kyo lubed up his cock. Then he was pushing Die’s thighs apart, wide enough that Die’s hips ached slightly but he couldn’t even remotely complain. Kyo kept one hand in Die’s hair as he pushed slowly into him, eyes down as he watched his length disappear into Die’s body. “Fuck, yes, do you see how well you take me, Die?”

Die _wished_ he could see, but it wasn’t really possible from this angle, and instead his eyes were locked on Kyo’s face, the pleasure there. The brief thought that there ought to be more pain considering how little prep he’d let Kyo do crossed his mind, but it was pushed aside quickly as Kyo started thrusting in and pulling back, fucking Die hard and so satisfyingly. Die’s hands ran over Kyo’s shoulders and then around to his back. He dug his nails in as Kyo gave a particularly hard thrust that had his whole body shifting up and back against the pillows. Pre-cum leaked from Die’s cock steadily, dripping onto his belly, and he whined as he watched it pooling there, but he didn’t want to let go of Kyo to touch himself.

Kyo’s eyes flitted over Die’s face and down his chest and abdomen to his drooling cock. With a quiet grunt he let go of Die’s thigh long enough to take hold of his wrist and move Die’s hand to wrap around his own dick. “I want to watch you get off with me inside you,” he told him, stroking the inside of his thigh again. “I want to feel you.”

“Oh, god,” Die said. He closed his eyes, but opened them again as he started pumping his cock, loving that Kyo was _watching_ him, never looking away, even as his thrusts continued. Die was slick with pre-cum and his hand moved over his cock easily, the wet sound of it arousing him further. “Kyo, I’m—I’m not gonna last—”

“Show me.”

Die went after himself harder, felt himself getting closer almost embarrassingly fast. As his orgasm built within him he drew his knees up, trying instinctively to close his legs more, but Kyo wasn’t having any of it. He pushed Die’s thighs wide again, getting a small cry out of him as he shuddered. Die tried to keep his legs where Kyo positioned them, tried to keep his eyes open so he could watch that dark, hungry look on Kyo’s face as he dug his fingers into Die’s thigh, holding him so firmly where he wanted him. Still Die’s hand was working his cock frantically, and god, he was so close, his balls drawn up tight, and with Kyo still moving in and out of him, filling him so perfectly.

“Kyo-o,” Die whimpered again, the mounting pleasure so intense it almost hurt. “Tell me… Tell me you want me to cum.”

“Daisuke, fuck,” Kyo groaned. “I want you to. I _need_ to see you covered in your own jizz, with my cock still buried in you. Cum for me like a _good boy_.” He thrust in hard and gave Die’s hair a tug.

“Kyo—oh fuck, _FUCK._ ” Die’s back arched up off the bed as he came almost violently, painting his stomach and up along his ribs with his release. “Oh god, _KYO_ ,” he moaned as Kyo’s grip tightened on his thigh keeping it in place.

It was the sheer _loudness_ of his own moan that woke him.

Die blinked several times before he could fully realize that he was on the tour bus. It was late, and everyone else must have turned in a while ago—or almost everyone. Curled up asleep on the bench across the table from him was Kyo. Die’s stomach dropped as he thought guiltily—but with an involuntary surge of pleasure and arousal—of just what had woken him. This time there couldn’t really be any willing it away either; the evidence was there soaking through his boxers, and geez, when was even the last time he’d had an actual wet dream? What, was he fourteen? He watched Kyo for a few more tense, silent minutes before deciding he was still sleeping soundly. As quietly as he could, Die scooted his way off his own bench and walked down the bus aisle to the bathroom to clean up, stowing away the overwhelming guilt and shame over where his subconscious mind had gone as an issue for the morning.

 

* * *

 

 

“ _Goddammit_!” Die growled in frustration, leaning over the counter to better see his hair in the dressing room mirror.

“What is it now?” Shinya asked, barely glancing up from his tablet.

“ _Still_ my fucking hair!” Die said. He’d been fighting with it for the past twenty minutes, but something he had done had left it totally snarled and he couldn’t get it to behave. If anything, it was _more_ tangled now than when he'd started out. Among other problems there was a hair tie that had gotten so completely knotted in he wasn’t sure how he could ever get it out without cutting it, which he was not exactly eager to do.

“What did you do to it?” Shinya said.

“I don’t know, I thought it was fine this morning!” Die said. “But I can’t go onstage with a hair tie dangling off my head like this. It must be because it was fucking raining and I had my hood up? But it’s never this bad!”

“There’s an idea. You can just leave your hood up the whole time you’re onstage,” Toshiya suggested from the other side of the room.

“Yeah, that’d go over real well,” Die said, rolling his eyes. “You guys are just laughing at me, aren’t you?”

Toshiya shrugged, moving to where Die could see him in the mirror. “It is kind of refreshing to see you like this, when your hair is always so shampoo commercial perfect.”

Die turned to glare at him before moving to focus on picking apart another snarl on the other side of his head.

“Whoa, who put the rat’s nest in Die’s hair?” Kyo said then as he came into the dressing room, finished with his soundcheck.

Die clenched his teeth. Even saying something so cheeky, Kyo’s voice had him fighting off a shudder after that second dream he’d had about him, and it wasn’t something he particularly wanted to deal with right now when he was already so fed up with this bad hair day. “Fuck off,” he gritted out.

Instead Kyo came and stood right beside him, looking at his face in the mirror with some concern. “Nah, come here,” he said, dragging out a chair and turning it around so Die could straddle it. “Sit!” He pushed Die’s shoulders easily, settling him on the chair and then walking around behind him, humming thoughtfully.

“I was getting it just fine,” Die said.

“Maybe if we had another six hours until we have to go on, sure,” Kyo said. He rested one knee on the edge of the chair behind Die, leaning forward. 

Die could feel Kyo’s breath on his neck, and then his hands were in his hair and Die was squeezing his eyes shut, trying to push down all the thoughts and feelings that the sensation dredged up. The tug as Kyo tried to separate two pieces of hair had Die inhaling sharply, barely suppressing a quiet moan that almost made its way out.

“Sorry,” Kyo mumbled. He scooted his knee forward on the chair, and Die could feel the warmth of his body against his back. “This might sting a little, but just bear with me.” 

Die gripped the back of the chair tightly as Kyo’s knee slid forward more, pressing his thigh against Die’s side, and Die struggled with what to do with the knowledge that he was effectively between Kyo’s legs. The rate at which his arousal was currently ramping up was alarming to say the least. Suddenly he was questioning whether he could count the dreams as just dreams, or he would have to admit they were actually a piece of a much larger attraction to his bandmate. He grunted as Kyo pulled more intently at one section, finally freeing the hair tie that had been stuck there.

“Shit, Die,” Kyo said softly, his fingers massaging the tender area of Die’s scalp that he’d just been yanking at. “Really got tangled up, didn’t you?”

Die bit down hard on the inside of his cheek, anything to keep himself from whimpering, or worse, from throwing Kyo off just so he could stand up and pin him against the wall instead. He felt Kyo leaning over him even more, picking something up from the counter and when the pressure eased up he opened his eyes, chancing a look in the mirror at Kyo’s face. His breath caught and he was glad he could disguise it as a sound of pain as Kyo pulled at his hair again, though it was really a fully involuntary reaction to Kyo’s casual _beauty_. Kyo’s brow was furrowed in concentration as he picked apart a knot with a fine-tooth comb in one hand, his glasses sliding down on his nose. 

Die finally realized he was staring when Kaoru came into the dressing room to ask Shinya to come to the stage for something. As they left, Die went back to keeping his eyes shut, feeling that was much safer. 

“This is just like old times,” Toshiya commented from the spot he’d returned to in the corner. “Remember when we used to help out with each other’s hair all the time? I feel like I should get a picture of this.”

Kyo laughed and the sound had Die tightening his grip on the back of his chair. That should _not_ be so arousing, he was sure. Die opened his eyes long enough to shoot Toshiya a look that clearly said _Don’t even think about it_ before closing them again, tipping his head forward to rest against his hands on the back of the chair.

Kyo spent another fifteen torturously long minutes sorting out Die’s hair before he was finally able to run his comb through it all without hitting any further snarls. He leaned back out of Die’s space and Die briefly mourned the loss of him, wanting Kyo’s thighs wrapped around his waist, never wanting Kyo’s hands to leave his hair.

“Good as new,” Kyo said, handing the comb to Die so he could finish styling it the way he wanted. His other hand drifted lightly over Die’s shoulder. “Sorry if I hurt you; I know it was pretty fucked up in places, but you were good through it.” 

Die looked up to see Kyo’s smile, and that, combined with his calling Die “ _good_ ” was enough to have Die’s cock throbbing, and he was relieved that he was pretty well hidden, sitting as he was, straddling the back of the chair. He just… wasn’t going to be getting up where he could be seen anytime soon. He coughed a little and managed to thank Kyo for his help before turning to finish working on his hair.

Kyo settled at the counter next to him, pulling out his makeup bag and going about putting in his contact lenses.

Die tried not to watch him, his mind working quickly over his body’s reactions. It wasn’t just dreams, and it wasn’t just Kyo as he was onstage either—it was _Kyo_ , plain and simple. Even just standing next to him, now starting to put on eyeliner, Kyo suddenly seemed like the most beautiful person Die had ever seen in his life, and there was no way he could keep denying that he absolutely wanted him.

And then there was that _kindness_ again, which only served to make him more attractive. Die frowned as he thought about it, how Shinya and Toshiya had watched him struggling with his hair, more amused than anything else, but as soon as Kyo had come into the room he’d offered to help without preamble. It was the kind of thing Kyo always did, that Die had only started really noticing recently. And in return, Die was doing what? Guilt washed over him heavily as he thought of how he’d woken up the other night on the tour bus with Kyo only a few feet away.

Kyo couldn’t ever find out. Unless… unless there was a chance Kyo could maybe, possibly want him too. Die squinted over at Kyo just for a few seconds before looking back at the mirror in front of him. He knew Kyo wasn’t entirely straight. He remembered years ago when they’d found out Kyo and Kaoru had a thing going on, though he had never found out why exactly it ended. Maybe Kyo had decided he wasn’t interested in men after all. Certainly, much as Die was wracking his brain for it, Kyo had never given any indication that he wanted anything more than friendly with Die. So no, Kyo could never find out how Die had started feeling about him.

Said feelings were getting harder and harder to ignore, however, and presumably harder to hide. Die was careful. He took great pains to not fall asleep on the bus unless he was safely in his bunk, just on the off-chance that he might have another completely inappropriate dream. He worked hard at not even sneaking glances at Kyo during concerts because that had a tendency to tip him far too quickly into dangerous territory. He didn’t want to be that kind of asshole that started actually _avoiding_ Kyo, just because he was troubled by his own feelings, but he caught himself _staring_ more times than he could count. This undeniable… attraction to Kyo was causing him nothing but frustration.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to give a special shout out to (SPOILERS!) this tumblr post: http://go-to-rakuen.tumblr.com/post/150871951948/   
> which partially inspired a piece of this nonsense. Heh.  
> I really feel like this is some extra level nonsense. So I hope you enjoy!

So far this soundcheck, Die had been doing a pretty decent job not totally staring outright at Kyo, though it wasn’t easy. Kyo was in those black skinny jeans, worn so tight Die thought he deserved a medal for keeping his focus anywhere else, and Kyo’s voice always got to Die more than he was really comfortable with. He wasn’t even singing most of the soundcheck, but every time he muttered some comment to the technicians about his levels, Die felt the vibrations going down his spine. Yeah, this was becoming a real problem.

“All right,” Kaoru said, handing his guitar off to a staff member. “I still have one more thing to check.” Another staff member brought out his sparkling purple saxophone and handed it to him.

_Wow_ , Die thought, _I forgot he was going to do the sax solo tonight_. 

Kaoru wet the reed and then played a few riffs before lowering the sax and frowning deeply. “This reed is no good,” he said. He took off the mouthpiece and examined the reed more closely. Finding it chipped, he shook his head. “I’ll not kiss a beat of this.”

Die thought to himself that that was a cool way to say that Kaoru wasn’t going to use that reed and wondered how Kaoru was so eloquent. _Maybe he should write lyrics_ , Die mused, watching as Kaoru was brought another reed to try.

Suddenly a loud, blaring fire alarm went off, and Die had the distant knowledge that it was because he hadn’t unplugged his curling iron in the dressing room. “Oh, no! Shinya caught the venue on fire!” he said loudly, trying to shift the blame off himself.

Shinya gave him an unimpressed look and sauntered off the stage, moving to evacuate the building with the rest of the band and staff.

Just as Die was following, Kyo stepped in front of him, blocking his path.

“Kyo, it’s not safe,” Die said. “We’ve got to get out of here.”

“Or, we could take advantage of the fact that we’re alone,” Kyo said. He looked up at Die with the hint of a smile playing at his lips, and then he was dropping to his knees in front of him.

Something finally clicked in Die’s brain as he fully realized that this was another one of those goddamn _dreams_. And sure, in retrospect, the saxophone should probably have been a hint, but who knows what drives the subconscious?

For a few seconds Die thought he should try to wake up. Now that he was aware that it was a dream he could pinch himself, or stop it from continuing, or do… something…

Or he could let dream-Kyo keep unfastening his pants, because that certainly seemed like a fine idea.

Well, it was just a dream. What could be the harm, really?

“I’ve been wanting you,” Kyo said as he pulled Die’s zipper down. “Have you noticed the way I can’t keep my eyes off you?”

Die was slightly amused that his subconscious had chosen to include this little detail, so blatantly the opposite of what really going on between them. And yet, having Kyo—even dream-version of Kyo—say it to him was plenty exciting. His cock was freed to the air the next moment, already swelling just from the way Kyo was looking at him.

Kyo wrapped a hand around Die’s length, squeezing in a way that maybe should have been painful, but Die could only give a pleasured moan.

And he knew he should be stopping this before it went any further. It was too risky, especially when they were on tour, to think about Kyo in this way, and wasn’t it taking advantage of him, in a way? Seeing Kyo like this without his permission, even if it was only in Die’s imagination? In spite of himself he widened his stance and said, “Open that pretty mouth for me, Kyo.”

Kyo did just that, a smile in his eyes. He reached out to hold Die’s hips, keeping him steady as he took his cock in, inch by inch, the most erotic of moans making its way out of him. Only when he’d taken the whole thing did he start to bob his head, his fingers digging in to Die’s hips, giving away how much control he was using to keep this calm. 

Die was completely entranced. Any thought of trying to wake himself up and stop this from happening totally vanished from his mind as he watched the way Kyo’s cheeks hollowed. Rather he was thinking how he never wanted to forget this exact image: Kyo with his mouth stretched so wide around Die’s cock his jaw had to be aching. He wondered if he’d ever be able to look at Kyo again without thinking of him like this, all hooded eyes and red lips, and god, it might have been the best thing he’d ever seen.

Which was to say nothing of how it felt, the most vivid sensations of pleasure piling up inside him, some intangible coil winding tighter and tighter as Kyo’s tongue flicked against his slit a few times before he was swallowing him down again. 

It was over much too soon as Kyo pulled off and pushed himself up to his feet in one fluid movement. Die almost whimpered, having wanted it to continue, possibly indefinitely, but then Kyo was backing him up and up until his legs hit the drum platform.

Kyo shook his head, his breath coming in pants. “God, sucking you gets me so worked up, Die. I can’t take anymore. I need to fuck you, now, right here.” His hands wandered all over Die’s sides, up under his shirt and over his chest, and then he was kissing anywhere he could reach, hauling Die down towards him, nipping at his neck. 

Die couldn’t form words, just let Kyo keep pulling at him, kissing and biting, the feel of his breath warm against Die’s neck enough to make him shudder. After some time, and with considerable effort, he got himself out of Kyo’s grip and turned around, bending over the platform. He worked his pants all the way down and looked over his shoulder as he presented his ass to Kyo. “Well then?” His cock was throbbing at the mere prospect of being taken this way.

Kyo smiled at him as he undid his belt. “You know, you look gorgeous like this.”

_That voice_ , Die thought, letting out a long breath, trying to keep himself as relaxed as he could. “Lube?” he said, possibly the lamest response imaginable.

“Shinya usually keeps some back there,” Kyo said. 

Die blinked a few times as he remembered that this was not reality and it wasn’t necessary to sit Shinya down for a talk about his kinks and their place in the workspace. He watched Kyo walk around behind the drum set and come back out smugly waggling a bottle of lube. His belt was hanging open, and the shape of his hard cock was clearly visible through the unreasonably tight material of his jeans, and Die barely bit back a loud and needy groan. He pushed his ass back more, desperate to feel that inside him.

He heard the bottle clicking open, followed by the wet sound of the lube as it squirted out, and then Kyo’s well-coated fingers were pressing against Die’s asshole, prodding and massaging before one slipped in. 

“Oh, _yes_ ,” Die gritted out, bracing himself more firmly against the platform. 

“Mm, Die, you look so good right now.” Kyo moved his finger in and out a few more times before adding another. “And you’re so tight and so _hot_ , just for me. I could just watch you ride my fingers like this all day.”

Die grunted, and looked at Kyo over his shoulder again. “What if the others come back?”

Kyo’s smile grew more wicked. “You’d like that wouldn’t you? Having everyone see you just like this, your hard cock leaking all over the stage while I fill your ass?”

The thought sent a shudder through Die’s whole body, ending in a strangled sort of sound exiting his mouth. He pushed back against Kyo’s fingers. “No,” he said, shaking his head, a deep flush creeping down his neck. “No, I don’t… don’t want them to see.”

“You don’t?” Kyo added a third finger, carefully spreading them inside Die before crooking them just so, getting Die to cry out loudly. “You don’t want them all to find you all sweaty and begging and desperate, so fucked-out you can’t think?”

A little wave of pre-cum spilled from Die at the mental images Kyo was providing. “N-no,” Die lied again, and bit his lip. 

“Tsk,” Kyo said, pulling his hand free and wiping it on his t-shirt. 

Die heard the sound of his zipper being lowered and wished he could see Kyo’s cock being revealed, even if none of it was real. There were more squelching sounds from the lube bottle and then the bottle fell to the floor, along with Kyo’s shirt that he’d been wiping his hands on. Die was distracted looking down at them when his head was jerked back by Kyo’s hand in his hair.

“You know, you shouldn’t lie to me,” Kyo said, his voice rumbling from his chest.

Die gasped as Kyo’s cock started to slide into him, achingly slowly. His mouth hung open, no sound coming out until finally, _finally_ , Kyo was fully seated within him, and he let out the smallest, “ohh.”

“Tell me the truth now, Daisuke.” Kyo tugged at Die’s hair a bit harshly.

Die tried to shake his head again and yelped when Kyo’s hand in his hair prevented the movement. “I ca-an’t,” he whined.

Kyo started moving his hips slowly, and Die could have sworn he could feel _everything_ , like he was watching it happen in a movie and feeling it at the same time, Kyo’s cock, so thick and unyielding pulling back out of him only to fill him again, seeming to hit even deeper than before.

“You can’t? Why not? Don’t you want to be _good_ for me?” Kyo hissed behind his ear as he leaned over him.

“Ohhh, god, yes, Kyo, I want to be good, I want—”

“Then say it,” Kyo said.

Die pictured it again, the rest of the band coming in and finding him like this, Kyo holding him in place as he fucked him senseless. He imagined the shock on their faces and how impossible it would be for him to hide a damn thing. “I-I want… _Fuck_ , I _want…_ ” Die gasped as Kyo brushed over his prostate and his thighs trembled. “I want them to catch me like thi-is, but I want to—ahh! to be _good_ and stay how you want me, even if they’re w-watching,” he managed, his voice shaking.

He could feel Kyo’s smirk against the back of his neck as he said, “That is so dirty.”

“Y-yes.”

“I like it,” Kyo said, shifting around and moving the hand not tangled in Die’s hair around to wrap around Die’s cock. His thumb circled the head, gathering pre-cum, and then his hand slid down the shaft and back up, his grip tight. “You’re always so good for me.”

“Fuck yes,” Die breathed out, completely lost in pleasure. “I’m so close, Kyo, I’m—I’m gonna cum right here on the fucking stage!” He bit his lip and his hands tried to find some purchase on the drum platform he was bent over. The very idea of doing something so filthy as losing it on the stage where they had to perform had him precariously close to the edge. He could feel his balls going tight and Kyo was still moving in and out of him at this easy pace, keeping him full and it was _so good_. “ _Kyo_ , fuuuck, I’m… Kyo, _yes_!!”

The sphere of energy that was his orgasm spun upward, its waves licking out from his core out in every direction and he had the strange sensation that he could _see_ it, reach out and _grab_ it, and then his eyes flew open and his hips bucked and—

Well, he was grateful to see that the dressing room was empty. Die let out a long, slow breath as he carefully sat up on the couch and tried to get himself under control. At least he hadn’t actually lost it before he woke up this time, but he was still right there on the brink, and he was debating whether he should risk just jerking off fast and taking care of it when he heard a polite sort of cough, and looked up in horror to see Kaoru leaning against the wall near the door.

“Kaoru!” Somehow Die had entirely failed to notice him when he first woke up; Kaoru did have that way of being rather still when he felt like it. Die looked frantically around the room, double checking that no one else was lurking, but there was no one else there. “What are you—How long have you been there?”

“I came to get you for soundcheck,” Kaoru said mildly. “You were asleep. I thought maybe I ought to let you wake up on your own.”

_Shit, shit, shit_ , Die thought. He didn’t even want to know what he might have said or done in his sleep that Kaoru could have witnessed. He was supposed to be more careful than this! “Soundcheck, right,” he said, hoping that could be the only conversation they had.

“See you out there in, what, five minutes?” Kaoru said, raising an eyebrow. He locked the dressing room door as he left.

 

Real life soundcheck was, predictably, a lot less interesting than the dream version had been. At the same time, it was almost harder for Die to focus through it. He caught himself watching Kyo during the idlest of moments, and not even in a sexual way, but just to _see_ him, to take in the small, simple details of how he stood or how he moved, anything Die might have missed in decades of knowing him. 

Sure, the sexual part was there too. It was incredibly difficult to not think about the dream he’d just woken up from when here they were on the very stage he’d been on in his subconscious. It was just this dirty secret that only he knew and that absolutely no one else could find out, what he’d so vividly been imagining barely half an hour earlier. He tried not to blush as he tore his gaze from Kyo for what felt like the hundredth time.

Thankfully, everything went smoothly and the soundcheck was finished in good time. Die handed off his guitar, thank yous were respectfully said, and Die was eager to get away as quickly as possible, mentally running through the places he could think of where he might be able to hide until it got closer to showtime. He didn’t even make it down the hall before a firm hand on his shoulder brought him to a screeching halt.

“Die, why don’t you join me outside for a chat,” Kaoru said, already steering him towards the stage door of the venue, and though he phrased it like a question, it was clearly no such thing.

Dread gurgled unpleasantly in the pit of Die’s stomach as he allowed himself to be pushed out into the air of the afternoon. Kaoru stepped out just behind him and wasted no time in pulling out a cigarette and lighting it. He leaned nonchalantly against the wall of the venue, eyes on some vague point in the middle-distance. Die crossed his arms over his chest, growing increasingly uncomfortable.

After a silence long enough that Die suspected it had been deliberately drawn out to unnerve him, Kaoru said, “So… Kyo, hmm?”

_Ah, fuck_. “What about him?” Die said, though he was aware just how unconvincing it was.

Kaoru ignored him. “How long has that been going on?”

“There’s nothing going _on_ ,” Die said. “I just… Not long. A couple weeks, maybe.”

“Hmm.” Kaoru’s face revealed nothing as he blew out some smoke and kept looking off.

“How did you know?” Die asked, though he wasn’t really sure he’d like any answer he got.

Kaoru finally turned to give Die a _look_. “Even if I hadn’t walked in on what I did in the dressing room, which included some very… colorful language, the way you’ve been looking at him is enough to tell me there’s something there.”

Die nodded unhappily.

“So what is it exactly?” Kaoru said.

“Ah.” Die shifted his weight from foot to foot. “I don’t know…”

“I don’t know if you know this, but Kyo and I went out for a while,” Kaoru said, looking off in the distance once more.

Die nodded again, remembering all too well the day Toshiya had eagerly told him and Shinya about it after discovering them in the dressing room. He couldn’t help now but wish it had been him walking in on that scene, the way Toshiya had described it: Kyo, half-dressed, sitting on the makeup counter, backed up against the mirrors, legs spread as Kaoru hunched over him, rutted against him with less control than any of them ever saw Kaoru exhibit. Toshiya said that when he came in, Kyo looked over Kaoru’s shoulder at him, held eye contact for a moment before dropping his head back and moaning, that Toshiya had felt like was walking right into a pornographic movie and it had taken him almost half a minute to engage his brain enough to exit the room once more. Die let himself imagine if it had been _him_ happening upon that erotic presentation. He thought about locking eyes with Kyo in that moment as he watched him moving against Kaoru, pictured the way Kyo’s eyelids would flutter shut, the sound of his voice so caught up in pleasure—Die tried to shake off the images, a shiver working through his whole body.

Kaoru cleared his throat and Die jumped, having gotten a bit lost in his thoughts. He blushed as Kaoru shook his head and said, “I don’t even want to know where your mind just went.”

Die thought that was probably true. “Sorry,” he said. “I um… yeah, sorry.”

“My point is,” Kaoru said, dropping the remains of his cigarette to the ground and crushing it with his heel. “Kyo’s not just a great fuck.” He took out another cigarette and lit it. “I mean, he’s that too, but he’s not _just_ that.”

Die wasn’t sure if he was supposed to respond yet so he just waited.

“Kyo is a kind and genuine person,” Kaoru said. He took a slow drag of his cigarette and breathed the smoke out without concern.

“I know,” Die said.

Kaoru glanced over at him with a raised eyebrow and then returned his gaze to some far off invisible point. “I don’t know what you want from him. I’m not judging. But he needs… More than just sex, so if that’s what you’re after… Don’t even waste your time ‘cause you’ll both end up hurt.” He brought the cigarette to his lips again, inhaling deeply, then shrugging. “He’s human; he needs to be loved.”

Die knew Kaoru was right, but he wasn’t totally sure what he wanted from Kyo either. He wanted him, and he knew it wasn’t just sexual because just being _around_ Kyo made him feel so many things. With Kyo, he felt safe, happy to the point of giddiness—and nervous and lost, too. He was so conflicted, he wanted to be around Kyo all the time, and to hide from him. He didn’t know what to call that combination.

“That’s why we fell apart in the end,” Kaoru said softly. “He needed something I couldn’t really give him, he _deserved_ more than he was getting from me.”

“ _Were_ you ever in love with him?” Die asked, looking at Kaoru curiously.

“With Kyo? Nah,” Kaoru said, shaking his head. “And… maybe I still am.”

Die watched as Kaoru finished smoking his second cigarette without saying anything else. Perhaps there was nothing else to say.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo I did worry that I may have gone kind of overboard with the kinky stuff in this one? I don't know. If I did, y'know, whoops! Sorry in advance. Uhh, enjoy!!

Some news show was playing on the TV in the hotel room, but Die wasn’t paying any attention to it at all. He’d been spending a lot of time with his thoughts in the days since his talk with Kaoru. He knew that Kaoru was right about Kyo, that Die needed to figure out what exactly it was he wanted and deal with those feelings. Whether he would actually _act_ on whatever feelings he figured out he was having was another story entirely, but he figured getting things sorted out in his mind was kind of the first step.

He tried to go through it bit by bit, starting with things that he was sure he knew:

He respected Kyo. As an artist, a musician, and a man, Kyo was just about as good as it got. He never gave less than his all in performance and yet offstage he was down-to-earth, quiet, and funny. In all the time Die had known him (which was honestly a pretty long time), Die had never really lost his temper with Kyo. Kyo was easy to get along with, but still passionate about so many things, and Die had to admit that these were all incredibly attractive qualities. He’d known few people in his life with whose personality he had meshed as well, and that was to say nothing of how _decently_ Kyo treated him. 

Die got up from where he’d been sitting on the bed and walked over to where he’d thrown down his duffel bag on top of the low dresser against the opposite wall. He started to root through it looking for his pajama pants as he considered this next aspect of Kyo. 

It had tended to be something of a recurring theme in his life for people to treat Die like shit, whether it was teachers, ex-lovers, or the odd friend who halfway through getting to know him suddenly wanted something from him that he had no interest in providing. Kyo had never been like that for a minute, and maybe it was just because they’d known each other and worked together for so long, but Die felt secure in the knowledge that Kyo respected _him_ as much as Die respected Kyo. 

Kaoru had reminded Die that Kyo was a “kind and genuine person” and sure, Die had known that. But hearing it put into words like that, it struck him how true it was. Kyo put his whole self on display, not just physically or vocally but emotionally, and yet he never gave the impression that he was being dishonest in his day-to-day life either. It wasn’t that Kyo was _perfect—_ oftentimes he was stubborn or tactless, and he had the tendency to be blatantly antisocial—but somehow all these aspects just contributed to whatever made him Kyo, and there wasn’t anything Die would want to change about that.

Die finally dug out his pajama pants and a tank top from his bag. He changed into them, and went into the bathroom to wash his face and get ready for bed. He looked at himself in the mirror and thought about what Kaoru had said about how obvious it was by the way Die _looked_ at Kyo that he was smitten. He examined his face from different angles, wondering just where it showed. He continued work on his mental list while he went about washing and moisturizing his face.

The next thing he was sure of was that he really _liked_ Kyo, as a person. It was one thing to say that they got along; even when Die lost his temper with people he was able to get along with most fairly well. With Kyo, he found he just actually liked being around him. Kyo was witty and interesting, and he laughed at Die’s jokes even when they were neither. And Kyo was just so fucking good-looking.

Die let out an embarrassed little laugh even though there was no one else around to hear it as he realized he’d gotten to that part of the rundown on his feelings. Okay, fine. Kyo was vexingly attractive, and the way he moved his hips seemed like it shouldn’t be allowed, and those dreams certainly hadn’t helped anything, but it seemed obvious now that they were more a symptom of a whole. Die sighed and rinsed his face, patted it dry with a hand towel. All right, so he was into Kyo. A lot. There were feelings involved. 

He went back over what Kaoru had said for the thousandth time, that Kyo needed to be loved. He’d hardly finished the question in his mind of, _Could I love Kyo?_ when his stomach was lurching in a way that told him, more honestly than his brain could, that he already _did_.

Die went back into the main part of the hotel room and flipped off the bathroom light. He grabbed up the remote and switched off the TV and was about to climb onto the bed when a knock at his door stopped him. He frowned as he went to answer it.

He opened the door to find Kyo standing in the hall in a v-neck t-shirt and pajama pants that were too long, holding his toothbrush.

“I’m apparently out of toothpaste,” Kyo said. “And the little tubes the hotels provide are just… way too nasty. Please tell me you have some I can use.”

There was something horribly humorous about having Kyo show up like this after the way in which Die had just been thinking about him, and Die couldn’t tell whether it was more amusing or disturbing. Still he stepped aside to let Kyo into the room and gestured towards the bathroom with a smile.

Kyo mouthed the words, “Thank youuu,” as he moved past Die and into the bathroom, closing the bathroom door only partway behind him.

Die went back to sit on his bed and a feeling of suspicion came over him as he realized this would be a perfectly fitting scenario for his mind to distort into another one of those sex dreams. How could he be sure he was awake right now? He frowned deeply and looked down at his hands, trying to get answers from them. He could hear Kyo finishing up brushing his teeth and figured he’d find out in a minute if he was going to behave like real-Kyo or dream-Kyo.

Kyo flashed Die a smile as he emerged from the bathroom. “Thanks again. I guess I thought I had some left, but I didn’t.”

“Yeah, no problem,” Die said, shaking his head.

Strangely enough, instead of heading for the door, Kyo walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed. “So what are you up to?”

Die shrugged. “Not much. I was just about to go to bed, really.”

“Did you want some company?” Kyo asked, and the look he turned on him sent sparks down to the base of Die’s spine.

“For… going to bed?” Die said carefully.

Kyo smirked and got up on his knees on the bed. “I didn’t say for _sleeping_.”

Okay, well that settled that then, this was definitely a dream. Die tried to work out when exactly he had fallen asleep, whether he would need to wash his face again when he woke up. He pinched his arm. “Ow!” he said. Frowning, he tried again, pinching his thigh this time.

Kyo was watching him with a certain amount of amusement as Die started lightly slapping himself in the face to no avail. Finally Kyo reached out and grabbed Die’s wrist. “Die. Hey. It’s not a dream.”

“What are you talking about?” Die said, trying to ignore him.

“I’m really here,” Kyo said. “I’m really in your hotel room, and I’m honest-to-god propositioning you. Just so we’re clear about it.”

Die glared at Kyo and then shook his head. “No, no, no, no, that doesn’t make any sense.” He got up from the bed as he tried to remember other methods he’d read about for waking up from dreams. He went and looked in the mirror across from the bathroom but only saw himself, nothing remotely unusual about how he looked. Kyo came up behind him, tilting his head at him in the mirror. Die tried blinking rapidly, but it didn’t seem to make any difference.

“What are you doing?” Kyo asked, but Die ignored him again and kept blinking. “I mean, I knew I appeared in your dreams, but is it really such a frequent thing that you can’t believe I would really be here now?”

Die stopped and turned to look at Kyo. “You knew you appeared in my dreams?” he said. “Aha! That’s proof that this isn’t real! The real Kyo definitely wouldn’t know something like that.”

“Um, the real Kyo definitely _would_ know something like that, and _does_ know something like that,” Kyo said, crossing his arms over his chest. “The real Kyo struggles to _not_ know something like that ever since you woke me up on the bus moaning my name while you obviously jizzed your pants like two feet away from me.”

The words hit Die like a truck filled with some sickly liquid of horror that he began sinking into. He stared, opened and closed his mouth a few times. “I—No. No, you were asleep,” he said meekly.

“Ah, but I wasn’t,” Kyo said. “Just like _you’re_ not, right now.”

It was apparent to Die now that this was absolutely no dream but rather a _nightmare_ —his _worst_ nightmare in vivid color and with surround sound. He looked around for some kind of escape.

“Just how often do you dream about me?” Kyo asked curiously, moving between Die and the room’s only exit.

“It’s happened… a few times,” Die said, swallowing uncomfortably. His mouth had gone incredibly dry.

“And what kind of dreams are they?” Kyo took a step towards Die.

Die instinctively took a step backwards, deeply troubled by the way Kyo was advancing on him. He couldn’t think of any way to answer Kyo’s question without suffering the worst imaginable humiliation and possibly freaking Kyo out beyond repair so he kept his mouth shut.

“Are they good dreams? Nightmares? Nothing that different from real life?” Kyo kept walking towards him, and Die kept backing up until he had nowhere left to go, only the bed behind him.

Die felt trapped and intimidated and he hated how much he _didn’t_ hate it. “They’re… good dreams,” he admitted reluctantly.

Kyo looked pleased. “Tell me about them?” He leaned forward just enough that Die leaned back away from him, losing his balance and falling down on the bed, less than gracefully.

“Kyo!” Die said, only more intimidated now that he didn’t even have his height to his advantage. “I _can’t_.” Kyo only kept looking at him, and Die made a frustrated little noise and said, “They’re… They’re _sex_ dreams.” As soon as he’d said it, he wondered why he’d done so. He should have claimed he couldn’t remember them, or _lied_ about their contents, but somehow the way Kyo was staring down at him made that kind of thinking amazingly difficult. 

Kyo just raised an eyebrow. “I’d gathered that much.”

Right, and Die should have realized that, given what Kyo claimed to have witnessed on the bus that night. “But…” Die shook his head in confusion. “You’re not… disgusted and uncomfortable?”

“Honestly?” Kyo pursed his lips thoughtfully. “I’m really not. That one time on the bus, when I woke you up, and… interrupted whatever dream you were having… Was that about me, too?”

Die nodded, trying not to let his face show how easily aroused he was just by the memory of that dream.

“The way you were acting afterwards had me wondering,” Kyo said. “But I didn’t confirm it until I heard my name come out of your mouth that other night.” He smirked. “Maybe I liked how it sounded; I was intrigued.”

Die was still really struggling to believe anything he was hearing. “You were?”

“Please, like you don’t know how gorgeous you are,” Kyo said, rolling his eyes. “I was waiting to see if you were interested enough to actually make a move, but eventually it seemed like you were never going to, so here I am.” He frowned suddenly. “Which, I’m realizing as I’m saying it, might mean you’re _not_ interested enough to _want_ to make a move. And I can absolutely leave if you’d rather I did that right now.”

“No!” Die said quickly. “I am interested, I’m just… slow to process things.”

“So I should stay?”

“If… you really want to,” Die said.

“And you’ll tell me about your dreams?” Kyo asked, his smirk returning.

Die swallowed nervously. “I don’t… What do you want to know?”

“ _Everything_ ,” Kyo said, eyes alight with interest.

“Um… Okay. Um.” Die rubbed his hands over his thighs and closed his eyes tight as he tried to think of where to start. He still wasn’t sure he’d be able to say any of it out loud, but Kyo was _here_ and he _wanted to know_ , and Die would just be flat-out lying if he said he didn’t find that exciting. “I guess the first dream I had was…” He paused, his mouth frozen, unable to form the necessary words. He took a deep breath and just blurted out the rest before he could get embarrassed enough to stop again, “I was sucking your cock, and you were just holding me right where you wanted me with your hand in my hair, and I… It was really hot.”

“Mm, that sounds hot,” Kyo agreed.

Die opened his eyes and saw that Kyo was no longer standing over him, but had gotten silently to his knees on the floor in front of him. “Yeah, you were just… fucking my mouth.” Die could swear he could see the flash of arousal in Kyo’s eyes. He balled his fists on his knees, unsure if he should try to keep looking at Kyo while he talked; he didn’t really know how much of that he could take if this was the way Kyo was going to be looking back.

“How did it end?”

“You woke me up,” Die said. “Right as you were about to shoot your load down my throat.”

Kyo moaned softly at that. “That’s unfortunate,” he said, leaning forward and placing his hands over Die’s on his knees.

Die wasn’t sure what moved him to say it, but he nodded and whispered, “I wanted it.”

And suddenly Kyo’s hands were sliding up Die’s thighs, his fingers catching on the waistband of Die’s pajama pants and pulling gently. Die lifted off the bed enough to let his pants travel down his legs until they were pooled on the floor at his feet. He was already half-hard, the conversation having a wholly noticeable effect on him. Die kept his eyes on Kyo, let the smaller man nudge his legs apart so he could get between them.

“Keep talking,” Kyo said, looking up at Die’s face once more before his attention was fully on the cock before him, his perfect lips pressing a slow line of kisses from the base to the tip while he cradled Die’s sac in one hand.

Die gasped and moved to grip the edge of the bed with both hands. “The n-next dream I had about you—was in a hotel room, just like this—Ah!” Die could barely keep coherent words coming in his mind, so he wasn’t sure how he could keep talking when Kyo took the head of his cock into his mouth. Kyo was looking up at Die’s face encouragingly as he took more of Die’s length, his free hand resting on Die’s thigh, so carefully _not_ squeezing. “In that one,” Die managed to focus enough to get some more words out, fighting with the dual images of the dream from his memory and the present all-too-erotic scene directly before him. “You wanted me to work my own cock, while you—you were fu-ucking me— _fuck._ ” Die’s head fell back as Kyo flicked his tongue against Die’s slit before he was bobbing his head, tongue still actively engaged, moving constantly against the underside of Die’s shaft while one hand still played with Die’s balls. Die let out a loud whine before he could start speaking again. “You said you wanted me to get myself off while you were inside m-me.” 

Kyo’s other hand came into play, firmly grasping the base of Die’s cock, squeezing rhythmically, and Die felt himself pulsing out a little wave of pre-cum, shuddering as he felt Kyo’s tongue and realized he must be tasting it at that moment. Die was rapidly losing focus, and he heard himself just vaguely muttering, “Fucking me… your—your cock… so… hard…”

Kyo pulled off, but stayed with his lips only an inch or two away as he said, “You liked that? Having me fuck you?”

Die lifted his head and nodded eagerly, grateful for how Kyo was trying to guide him back and keep him on topic, even though it was torture losing the heat of Kyo’s mouth on his dick when he pulled off. “You were so _big_ ,” Die said, and Kyo smiled almost bashfully before he took Die back into his mouth. “I—I know it was a dream, but I felt so _full_ and it was so, so good. You had your hand in my h-hair again, and you were holding me— _shit_ , Kyo, I c-can’t, I can’t _think_!” Die was whining again, his thighs trembling on either side of Kyo.

Kyo moaned around Die’s cock and Die looked down and saw a dribble of saliva escaping from the corner of Kyo’s mouth, running down his chin. Letting out a moan of his own, Die hauled Kyo up off his dick and kissed him greedily, all but fucking his mouth with his tongue, loving how he could taste himself all over Kyo. Kyo got one hand in Die’s hair and Die thought for a second that he might lose it just from that, but then he realized Kyo’s _other_ hand had disappeared into his own pajama pants and he could make out the shape of it wrapped tightly around Kyo’s arousal.

“ _Kyo_ ,” Die said, suddenly aware that his hands on Kyo’s shoulders were actually just about all that was supporting Kyo anymore. Kyo wasn’t half as intimidating as he’d started out, having gone all kind of wild-eyed and panting, all that earlier sense of control dissolved like sugar on Die’s tongue. “God, you’re hard, aren’t you? From sucking me?”

Kyo nodded and chuckled, his hand falling from Die’s hair to Die’s knee, where he could lean on it a little more. “What did you expect?”

_Not this_ , Die thought as he stared down at him. No matter how many times he’d dreamed it, everything happening tonight was entirely unexpected. All at once he remembered the Kyo from his soundcheck dream, how turned on he’d been after getting Die in his mouth—and his face must have changed because Kyo gasped, dug his fingers in where he was holding Die’s knee.

“What is it?” Kyo said. “God, did you dream that too? Did you dream about choking me on your cock?”

“No,” Die said, his voice coming out sounding slightly strangled. “I mean, you—you didn’t choke.”

Kyo’s eyes closed and he pulled his hand out of his pants, doubling over as he just grabbed harshly at his crotch through the material instead, looking pained. “Go on,” he said, through gritted teeth.

“I haven’t honestly been able to get the image out of my head since I had that dream… Whenever I see you, I can’t help but remember how you looked.” Die licked his lips, stroked his fingertips lightly over Kyo’s cheek. “Is your jaw aching now?”

Kyo glanced up at him with a half-smile. “No more than I enjoy.” His eyes traveled southward and Die followed his gaze to his still exposed and blatantly hard cock. “You stopped me,” Kyo said quietly.

“I had to, I… I would have cum,” Die confessed.

“I wouldn’t have minded,” Kyo said, rubbing just the palm of his hand slowly along the front of his pajama pants now. “What about in the dream? Did you—” He paused and looked away before closing his eyes, seeming nervous for the first time all night. “Did you cum on me, on my face?”

Die could only gape at him. He hadn’t ever even thought of it, but the mental image sent hot arrows of lust straight to his groin, and the fact that _Kyo_ was the one bringing it up now… Die shook his head carefully. “No, you… You got too excited and had to fuck me right there on the stage.”

“On the _stage_?” Kyo’s eyes popped open. He looked delighted by this detail. “My, my, got a bit of an exhibitionist streak in you, eh, Die?”

“Possibly,” Die conceded, recalling the hidden away desire to be caught by the rest of the band, humiliated in front of them. He wasn’t sure just how in-depth he needed to describe his kinks to Kyo in this moment and didn’t say anything further.

“Good to know,” Kyo said, finally getting back to his feet. “I’ll have to remember that.”

“And I’ll have to remember to cum on your face next time,” Die said, arching an eyebrow.

There was that flash in Kyo’s eyes again and Die was being shoved down on the bed with Kyo on top of him, kissing him roughly, yanking at his tank top.

“Story time’s over then, I take it?” Die said, half-laughing when Kyo broke the kiss long enough to get Die’s shirt over his head. 

“Mm, for now,” Kyo said. “Why, did you have more you wanted to share?”

Die pushed his hands up under Kyo’s shirt, ran his fingers over his abs. “Not currently.”

Kyo kissed Die again, grinding down against his bare thigh while he caught Die’s lower lip between his teeth and tugged at it. He started moving his kisses lower, down over Die’s chest, and after a minute, Die pushed him back, frustrated that he’d ended up completely naked while Kyo had yet to remove any clothing at all. Once Kyo was situated more upright, straddling one of Die’s thighs, Die managed to get his t-shirt off him and Kyo let out a short laugh.

“What’s funny?” Die asked, though he could think of several things about this night that were “funny,” to say the least.

“Your dreams…” Kyo shook his head. “Seems like you got a lot of things pretty right.”

“Yeah?”

“But you got maybe _one_ thing… pretty wrong.”

Die frowned and sat up. “What’s that?” he asked as Kyo looped his arms around his shoulders.

Kyo leaned in so close Die thought he might kiss him again, but then he was just pressed totally against him, his lips grazing Die’s ear as he breathed out, “I love the feel of a dick in my ass way too much to be the one fucking you.”

Die’s brain short-circuited and then turned completely off as Kyo swiped his tongue mischievously across Die’s cheek and then sat back smirking wickedly and reaching into the pocket of his pajama pants. He pulled out a condom and lube and raised his eyebrows at Die, who was still sitting unmoving and unthinking, unable to get himself to take any action at all.

“Gonna make me do it all myself?” Kyo said, popping the lube open and squeezing some onto his fingers. Then his hand was back in his pants, but the movement was different this time, and Die couldn’t tear his eyes away from Kyo’s face, perfectly aware of what he was working on inside his clothing.

It seemed to require the effort of every muscle in his body but Die managed to get his hands back on Kyo, just stroking up and down over his thighs while he opened himself up. Kyo was looking back at him, eyes hooded, hair sticking to his forehead with sweat here and there. Die reached for Kyo’s free hand, brought it to his lips and gently kissed his knuckles. Kyo started to smile, but before it was fully formed, Die was sucking two of Kyo’s fingers into his mouth and Kyo’s eyes went wide. Die held Kyo’s wrist as he slid his tongue along the digits, between them, before hollowing his cheeks and sucking hard, imagining the weight of Kyo’s cock in his mouth. It occurred to him that in all of this he still hadn’t seen Kyo’s actual cock and was only able to imagine what he’d seen in his dreams. That was going to have to change soon. Kyo whimpered and Die could tell from the change in his movements that he was fucking himself harder with his other hand. Slowly, Die pulled off, making sure to do so wetly, and he watched with satisfaction the awed way in which Kyo stared at his hand, at the saliva stringing between his index and middle fingers.

While Kyo was sufficiently distracted by that, Die took the opportunity to get the condom open and snugly fitted over his erection, which, if it had waned at all, was back to full-mast now, especially what with the increasingly desperate noises Kyo was making as he rode his own fingers.

“Do you—do you ever think of me on purpose?” Kyo suddenly asked, catching Die off-guard. “I mean… you know, when you're awake, think about me when you’re jerking off or…?”

Die paused thoughtfully. He’d been so careful _not_ to deliberately get off thinking about Kyo, and now he felt like he’d be disappointing him if he said as much. “I think about you a lot,” he said slowly. “But, I try… not to think of you… like that.” He placed a gentle hand on Kyo’s arm, trying to let him know he was being kind of serious. 

Kyo adjusted, pulled his hand out of his pants and wiped it off on the t-shirt they’d tossed to the foot of the bed, and returned his attention to Die.

“I didn’t want to cross some kind of line with you, fantasize about you without your knowing about it,” Die explained. “It’s been… really difficult. You are just…” He shook his head, lost for words. “And now I’m even wondering if you were playing it up, doing things on purpose… But I’m almost always _thinking_ about you. I want…” He chewed his lip, watched how Kyo was looking at him so searchingly. “I want more with you. If you’re interested, I don’t want this to just be fucking; I’d like to… love you. I _do_ love you.”

Kyo’s eyes narrowed for a fraction of a second and then his face split into one of the most sincere grins Die had ever seen on it. “Lucky!!” he said, holding up a hand, and Die snorted as he realized he was waiting for a high-five. 

Die obliged, shaking his head again. “You’re a dork.”

“What’s that? I think I heard you say that I’m incredibly sexy and you can’t wait to ravage me?” Kyo said, head cocked to one side.

Die laughed and swiftly flipped them over so he was looming over Kyo, both of them still smiling honestly. “I didn’t say that out loud, but I was thinking it, so I guess it counts.”

Kyo wriggled his way out of his pajama pants at last and tossed them over the side of the bed. He laid his arms back, resting them on the pillow above his head, and let his legs fall open.

For a brief second, Die was hit with the thought of Kaoru taking Kyo this way, of Kyo _loving the feel of Kaoru’s dick in his ass_ , and he almost choked before he returned to the here and now and lined himself up at Kyo’s entrance. Kyo was watching him with a strange sort of look but it dissolved into an expression of pleasure as Die pushed his way smoothly into him.

“All right?” Die said, positioning himself more fully over Kyo.

“Yeah,” Kyo said, nodding, “ _Good_.”

Die’s breath stuttered abruptly out of him at the absolute simplest of words and he tried to cover it by starting to move against Kyo. Yeah, that was a recurring little detail he’d conveniently omitted when he’d relayed his dreams, something that had clearly leaked over into real life so that Die could barely hear Kyo speak the word _good_ without his cock twitching over it. Nothing had really changed since that first dream. He still _so_ wanted to be _good_ for Kyo, wanted to hear him say it, and he felt almost shamefully certain that if he only asked, Kyo would be more than happy to tell him what he wanted to hear.

Die started snapping his hips more sharply against Kyo, getting lost in the sounds of their bodies together. 

Kyo’s hand tangled in Die’s hair, pushed it back where it hung loose all around his face, and Die bit back a moan. “Seem to remember from what you said about your dreams that this was something you liked,” Kyo said with a smirk, tightening his grip on Die’s locks.

Die managed a breathy, “ _Yes_.”

“I like it too,” Kyo said, and then his mouth dropped open as Die apparently hit something quite nice inside him. “Nn, I’ve always liked your hair. So much to grab onto, and it’s just always so _good_.”

“ _Fuck,_ ” Die spread his legs more, fucked Kyo harder, and Kyo’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Die—”

“Say it again,” Die whispered, trying to hide his face against Kyo’s shoulder.

“About your hair?”

Die shook his head, letting out a soft cry at the sting of Kyo’s hand in his hair, still avoiding eye contact. Die wasn’t really moving anymore, just the occasional subtle rock of his hips. There was a pause where Kyo didn’t seem to understand what Die wanted, which certainly wasn’t his fault, Die could admit, since Die wasn’t being straightforward with him at all. “About… I want to be good.” It came out so quiet Die wasn’t even sure he heard it himself. 

“You _are_ good,” Kyo said, but he sounded puzzled. He turned Die’s face so he could see it. “Hey. You’re upset.”

“Not upset,” Die said, closing his eyes so he wouldn’t have to look at Kyo. “Just… in the dreams, sometimes you would… say I was good.” 

“…Yeah?” Kyo still sounded uncertain.

“Like that I was… your _good boy_ , and I… wanna be.”

“Ohhhhhh.” There was the clear sound of comprehension and for a moment Die was _sure_ Kyo was going to start laughing—but he didn’t. Die opened his eyes and saw Kyo peering back up at him, his tongue peeking out between his lips. Kyo gave Die’s hair a tug. “All right then, show me what a good boy you can be. Fuck me so _good_ I wreck my voice for tomorrow’s live just screaming your name.”

Die didn’t need any more encouragement than that to start moving again, holding Kyo close. He felt Kyo’s legs hooking around his hips, heard Kyo’s soft, “ _Fuck yes, just like that,_ ” and images flew through his mind all at once, piled on top of each other so he could scarcely distinguish them; dreams and reality, fantasy and _Kaoru._ Die knew he must be so _bad_ , thinking any of it, but oh, for Kyo he could be _good_ , and meanwhile, _christ_ , Kyo was so impossibly tight around him—That was something he’d never encountered in the dreams and he hadn’t been prepared for how it would feel to be _inside_ Kyo like this, so _hot_ and just surrounded. He wanted Kyo to at least feel half this good and shifted his weight so he could get a hand between them, reaching for Kyo’s cock, which was easily as gorgeous as he’d imagined it, maybe a bit thicker, honestly. And currently, it was rock hard and leaking pre-cum down onto Kyo’s abs. Die’s fingers slipped through the mess and then his hand was stopped as Kyo grabbed his wrist before he could get a grip on his dick.

Die looked questioningly at Kyo and saw him shaking his head. “Don’t need it,” Kyo said and choked, throwing his head back as Die thrust in hard. “OH, god, y-yes, right there, fuck yes!” 

Die did his best to follow directions, aiming for the same spot again.

A sinisterly beautiful, high-pitched keening came from Kyo at that, and both his hands were in Die’s hair now, hanging on like he might drown if his grip slackened for an instant. He got his legs tighter around Die as well and started talking in a rushed whisper, “God, I can cum like this, Die, I—It’s… It’s so _fucking_ good.”

Die slowed his pace, enjoying the simultaneously tortured and blissed out look on his lover’s face and wanting to drag it out. Kyo was always beautiful, and yet Die had never seen him at this level of perfection before and he wanted to memorize it.

Kyo was squirming beneath him impatiently, tossing his head from side to side. “Diiie,” he whined in an oddly uncharacteristic manner. “Why are you teasing me _now_? I’m s-so close, _please_ , please, fuck me _right_ , please! Don’t… don’t you want to be good, good for me?” The way his voice cracked made it sound a little less dominant than he probably meant it to, but the intent was still there.

“Yes,” Die said, but he had to admit to himself, he was really enjoying the begging too. It was novel and not at all unattractive to see Kyo so utterly falling apart with need, when he usually denied needing anything from anyone. Yet here he was naked and whimpering at Die’s mercy—though no less strong or powerful than he always was. Die knew Kyo could turn the tables on him at any moment and the fact that he was apparently _choosing_ to be at Die’s mercy like this only made it more thrilling.

Still, he was ready to give Kyo want he wanted. He gave Kyo’s cock a few quick jerks, just enough to gather his pre-cum on his fingers, and then forced two fingers into Kyo’s mouth as he opened it to cry out. Kyo barely had time to look surprised before Die started fucking his ass hard and deep again, still aiming for that sweet spot inside him.

“Suck,” Die instructed, fucking his fingers in and out of Kyo’s mouth. “Taste yourself.” Kyo let out a little gasping moan and Die grew curious and more bold. “You like how you taste? Maybe you do this a lot. I can picture you, jacking off then just licking your hand clean after…” He _could_ picture it, thought he’d probably be picturing it for ages to come, even when he wasn’t meaning to. 

Kyo only moaned again and moved one hand from Die’s hair to clutch desperately at Die’s hand, trying to take in more until Die felt like his fingers were halfway down Kyo’s throat. 

“Think you’d only like this better if it was my cock,” Die said, aware of how the tension was coiling wrapped around his spine now. “But then you’d want my cum all over your face instead of lapping it up, isn’t that right?”

Kyo’s eyes were wide and he looked almost scared as Die felt his body trembling beneath him, fluttering around his cock as he kept driving into him.

“I’d love to paint that pretty face sometime,” Die said lowly, and whatever slender thread had been holding Kyo together was done for. Kyo arched up from the bed, screaming silently, hips jerking as his cum spurted across his abdomen and Die’s, seemingly endlessly.

Even now, Die half expected himself to wake up, find himself in some horribly embarrassing situation, but instead it was only a few more halting thrusts and he was cumming, filling the condom deep inside Kyo, his vision hazing a bit with the quiet intensity of his orgasm. He had to gently pat Kyo’s leg to get Kyo to relax and let him pull out. Kyo was panting and sweaty, looking especially boneless where he was sprawled on the bed. Die got up carefully and went to the bathroom, washing himself off quickly and coming back with a cup of water and a damp washcloth. He helped Kyo to sit up and drink the water, and to get cleaned up, feeling pleasantly safe in this kind of layered intimacy. 

When he set everything aside, Kyo sagged back down against the bed, humming something musical idly to himself.

Die smiled at that. “I love your singing,” he said as he lay down beside Kyo and hit the lightswitch at the head of the bed.

“I would hope so,” Kyo said, his voice coming out somewhat hoarse.

“I don’t mean just professionally, I mean when you sing, it makes my heart happy,” Die said. He made a face in the darkness, wondering if what he’d said sounded as lame to Kyo as it did to him. “I just like your voice anyway.” In a moment of honesty he added, “I could get hard just listening to you.”

“Hmm, then I guess I’d better shut up, so we can get some sleep,” Kyo said, rolling onto his side and getting an arm around Die’s waist.

“Will you be here in the morning?” Die asked quietly.

“I’m sure as fuck not wakin’ up before you,” Kyo answered, and nuzzled his face into the pillow Die was lying on.

Die let himself smile a little broader. “Maybe I’ll wake you up with coffee.”

“Must be a truly miraculous day for me,” Kyo mumbled. “New boyfriend _and_ hotel room instant coffee? Sounds like _I’m_ the one dreaming this time.”

“Who’s the new boyfriend? Is he cute?”

“Adorable. Kind of an asshole, but the lovable type,” Kyo answered, pulling Die closer with his arm around his middle. “I’ll introduce you in the morning.”

“I look forward to it,” Die said, laughing. Then, “It is me, right?”

Kyo’s response was to pinch Die’s nipple roughly. “You gonna shut up and let me sleep or what? You should know you fucked all the energy right out of me.”

Die pulled Kyo’s hand up and kissed his knuckles once, twice, before wrapping Kyo’s arm around himself again. “Goodnight, Kyo.”

“Goodnight, love,” Kyo said, a yawn at the edge of his words.

Die fell asleep easily. He didn’t dream.


End file.
